Malaysia - London Part 1

ALLAH works in mysterious ways......when both my sister and me needed a break to get away from it all, the opportunity to accompany her Big Boss came.....London..........I, the ever obedient sister dengan penuh kerelaan dengan segera offered myself untuk teman.......dalam tempoh masa yang singkat cuti dipohon, tiket ditempah and beg di "pack".......London here we come......

I took the opportunity to unwind...I needed the time to re-evaluate my priorities....re-align my life and decide on my future.........to replenish my shoe collection too.....he he he.....this is the first time my sister and me pergi bercuti tanpa the whole group...without the Brady Bunch...really miss them.......one things for sure, both of us could not make it without our tourist guide....Pumpkin and Shaq.....thanks girls....without the both of you, we would be stuck in the comfort of the hotel room.......naik turun lif and just around the lobby.......he he he

Its also a sister bonding time for both my sister and me......I really luv every second of it....thanks sis......adik luv u.....will be there for you alwiz....alwiz.........we r like siemese twins in all the pictures......

Its also an opportunity to mengubat rindu pada Pumpkin.....my little Pumpkin dah bertambah comel.....very independant......glad that she has found a kindered spirit....Shaq...[more in the 2nd Part of the entry k guys]

Beam me back to Malaysia....i supposed that was what my Pumpkin is trying to do........

Renaisance Chancery Court....very majestic looking.......there is view of the hotel at nite tapi not in my camera so sabarlah people...will update with more pictures nanti k.....

At the lobby....those are fresh flowers...purple in colour....cantik...rasa macam nak ambil tetapi malulah pula.....there was something yang i ambil though.....toblerone chocolates at the receptionist counter...apple pun ada ....yummy.....
Me, my sis and Pumpkin outside the Renaisance Chancery Court, Holborn....nampak gemuk because pakai baju berlapis lapis....... and still sejuk.......miss the sun.....home is where the heart is.......ssssssseeeeejjjjuuuukkkk

Posing habis depan club house before breakfast......its a beautiful hotel both inside out.......ada gambar the rooms tapi ntah mana lah pula tak jumpa dalam kamera yang ini...nanti will update the gambar of the room.......gambar bawah ni gambar me, myself and i lah......

End of Part 1.....................akan bersambung

WOMEN- DAUGHTER, WIFE AND MOTHER

Women....ALLAH's most wonderful and cherished creation....bukan perasan tetapi a fact....they are both strong and weak at the same time...wonder why i said that kan? strong because come what may, they will strive tetapi weak in a sense because when they LOVE , they love unconditionally and be blinded by it..the unconditional LOVE given are at times taken for granted.

...painfull as it is but I have to admit its true....when WE women LOVE, be it our husbands or boyfriends we give everything, we swallow everything with the hope that the love given would be reciprocated and that harmony is maintained....

...but men just dont understand us.....they dont understand how much it hurts... when the trust given is betrayed...when loyalty expected from them by women is thrown down the drain.....when the love u profess to them not so long ago seems to dissapear........when nothing they do is ever right anymore or enough......when no words r spoken and what is left is mere silence......

We live in societies where there is an overload of "what a woman must do for her husband"and it is not balanced with information about what a husband must and can do for his wife - men forget, society lets them and society consists of both men and women. Such lingo and talk need a more important and prominent place in our daily lives.

I read this article in the net recently by Sherif Mohammad entitled "Advice to Husbands, From a Husband"....so true.....

He started his advive by talking about the inscription on a toombstone of one of an army officer who died during the El Alamein battle in Northern Egypt on the summer of 1942 by his wife. It reads as follows:-

"To the world, you were just a soldier. But to me, you were the whole world"

He went on by saying that by getting married you are not just getting a wife, you are getting your whole world. From the day you married her, your wife will be your partner, your companion, and your best friend. She will share your moments, your days, and your years. She will share your joys and sorrows, your successes and failures, your dreams and your fears.

When you are ill, she will take the best care of you; when you need help, she will do all she can for you; when you have a secret, she will keep it; when you need advice, she will give you the best advice. She will always be with you. When you wake up in the morning the first thing your eyes will see will be her. During the day, she will be with you, if for a moment she is not with you, physically, she will be thinking of you, praying for you with all her heart, mind, and soul. When you go to sleep at night, the last thing your eyes will see will be her; and when you are asleep you will still see her in your dreams.

In short, she will be your whole world and you will be her whole world.

The closeness of the spouses to each other was also mentioned in the Quran: " They are your garments and you are their garments"

The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and compassion, peace and tranquility that fills the hearts of the spouses is simply inexplicable.

The only rational explanation for these most amazing of all human feelings is that: it is an act of God. Only God Almighty in His infinite power, boundless mercy, and great wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing feelings in the hearts of the spouses. In fact, God is reminding those who search for His signs in the universe, that these feelings in the hearts of the spouses are among the signs that should guide humans to His existence.

As He says in the Quran: "And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect."

But the human heart is not a static entity, it is very dynamic. Feelings can and do change with time. Love may wither and fade away. The marital bond might weaken if not properly cared for. Happiness in marriage cannot be taken for granted; continuous happiness requires constant giving from both sides.

I re-read the article over and over again and my fear of commitment surge to greater heights....I am so afraid....so so afraid.......Afraid to be in love, Afraid to trust, Afraid to commit, Afraid to open up......sigh.........

P/S : To Men out there: Please dont take the women in your life for granted.....LOVE & Cherish them.....

The Inevitable Bumps in the Road

"Jika bersedih hati, panggillah jiwamu dengan harapan sebagai janji kerana kebaikan bagi jiwa adalah adanya janji,
jadikanlah harapanmu sebagai perisai atas serangan putus asamu hingga waktu waktu akan menghapus kesedihan itu
tutuplah dirimu terhadap orang yang sering duduk bersamamu kerana mereka selalu iri dan mendengki
tidak perlu bimbang akan berlaku sesuatu, sebab ini akan membuat orang yang hidup mati sebelum kematian itu sendiri
kesedihan itu tak akan kekal, seperti juga kesenangan tidak akan kekal
seandainya bukan kerana hal yang mempengaruhi jiwa, pasti tidak akan ada hidup yang lurus bagi orang yang terjaga".....Don't Be Sad by Dr. Aidh Abdullah Al Qarni.

Allah tidak akan membebani seseorang melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya. Surah Al Baqarah:286

"Manusia tidak akan mampu melawan setiap bencana, menaklukkan setiap derita dan mencegah setiap malapetaka dengan kekuatan sendiri. Kerana manusia adalah makhluk yang sangat lemah. Mereka hanya mampu mengahadapi semua itu hanya dengan bertawakkal kepada Allah; percaya sepenuhnya kepada pelindungnya, dan menyerahkan semua perkara kepadaNya. Kerana jika tidak demikian, jalan keluar mana lagi yang akan ditempuhi manusia yang lemah tidak berdaya ini semasa menghadapi ujian serta cubaan"....tafsiran dari Surah Al Maidah:23
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Something happened last Friday that made me feel so hurt and sad...so hurt that i cried buckets...now thinkin about it still brings tears to my eyes . I've never cried that profusely before....how could they do that to me.....what have i ever done to them that desrves this.....how will i survive..why are they so mean....i have given my all and is this what the give me in return.why do they hate me that much........these questions keep repeating in my mind......when i think of what those people said and would say I cried louder........I just can't stop my tears....Its like a burst dam......... Those closest to me panicked...nothin anyone said made the pain and hurt go away...nothin...I felt numb and betrayed...All i wanted to do is cry...role down and die.......In my maker I turn and to him I pour my sorrows and hurt...I found peace and that made it a bit bearable.....

I am slightly more composed now than I was that nite......as usual if anything bad happened I would go cut my hair.... I went to Saw in KLCC...had Edwin the director to cut my hair..shorter than it was before and i am very satisfied with the result....I did my padicure and manicure in the Nail Shoppe and my facial in SKII.....than it was retail therapy all the way....new working clothes from Cultivation, shoes from the high end Vincci, clothes from Nicci, new pair of jeans from Giordano... I even brought new undergarments from Marks & Spenser.....very costly therapy but I am happi........costly retail therapy I know....but at least when I go to the office on Tuesday I would look so good that people would drool and salivate.........akan ada yang bergossip tetapi ingatlah setiap umpatanmu itu pahala bagi ku.......Allah itu maha pemyayang and akan sentiasa memaafkan umatnye tetapi kesilapan manusia terhadap manusia yang lain tidak terampun selagi tidak diampuni oleh orang yang disalahi........I am being very vengeful but how not to? Like what Donald Trump said in his book "Think Big and Kick Ass"......."when someone screw you , you screw them back in spades"..this means when someone hits you, hit em back...HARDER...Likewise a piece of good advice from his wife Ivana...."don't get even...get everything".

I also re-read "Jangan Bersedih" hence the extract from the book as preliminary for this entry....I will not let this be a stumbling block and would use this to be better. I will walk softly and carry a big attitude....

In Him I trust my fate. I made a promise to Him and to myself that I will be strong...I will not cry. I will not let them have the satisfaction of seeing me cry...never ever....I will not loose hope....come what may insyaalah I know that everything will be ok....... It hurts a lot now, that i can't deny and I am trying to not let it effect me so.......My war has began....my faith in ALLAH as my guide and with the love of my family and those few whom i trust, I will survive this and i will prevail......

Dedicated to my dearest Lulu Part 2

Suatu masa dulu, disebuah kampung yang tenang dan permai named Lala Land lived 2 best friends named Lulu & Lola. They are alwiz together...mandi sungai sama sama, main "pondok pondok" sama sama, played barbie & kent pun sama......semuanya pun bersama sama.....they shared everything together....they speak the same wave lenght and understood each other so well....... and they dislike nasi ayam....

Their favourite past time is to collect and update "the list" of fruits that they collected in the jungle....strawberries, lulian, star fruits, kiwi, mango....etc......those were the happy days...

To preserve the fruits that they collected , Lulu decided to go to a faraway country named Tutti Fruitti Land to learn the art of preserving the fruits and the effect of bad & rotten fruits to the environmental.... Their farewell was a teary occasion and they missed each other tremendously when they ara apart....they started to count days when Lulu would come back to Lala Land.

Being so far away from home was difficult for Lulu and she misses her family and friends especially Lola. At times she feels really down & lonely and all she wish for is to be home.....to be in the arms of her luv ones.....

Whilst in Tutti Fruitti Land Lulu had a heartbreak...Lulu was devastated...she cried and there was nothing that Lola could do to make Lulu feel better...Lola wish with all her heart to be there for Lulu but the distance was too much....it breaks Lola's heart to hear Lulu crying and that there's nothing she could do to make it better for Lulu...Lola can only hope that in time Lulu would be OK. Lola pray that the friends that Lulu met in Tutti Fruitti Land especially the Queen & Mr France would be able to help Lulu to smile again....

Lola prayed that Lulu will stay strong and have faith in what ALLAH has in store for her and that things will in the end be for the best....Lola wants Lulu not to blame herself because what happened was beyond her control...that she is a wonderful and lovable person...that the cause of Lulu's heartache would soon be SORRY and realise the mistakes he made..... Lola wants so much for Lulu to be happy and laughing again.....

Lola wants Lulu to know that comes March, 26, those who luvs her would be there in Tutti Fruitti Land to give her a great big hug and loads of kisses....Lola wants Lulu to know that she is someone special and that she can flap her lab coat, close her eyes and she would be home in the heart of those who luvs her.......Lulu will, if she could bring lulian to Tutti Fruitti Land and they will all have a beary big hug......

......things will be ok my dearest and the hurt will all be gone......what happened yesterday will make u a stronger person and happier today......come what may Lola will alwiz love her little baby Lulu.........

"Love never fails, alwiz protects, alwiz trusts, alwiz hopes & alwiz perseveres"

Dedicated to my dearest Lulu

Download Brandy - Right Here

Tired

I am very de-motivated with everything that has been going on in the office. I am frustrated because i feel as though I am in a ship with no captain..We are all sailing aimlessly and many are fighting for the captain's position. The apple polishing that's been going on made me feel so sick that i feel like vomitting..I am lost for words and all I can say is may ALLAH bless all of us..

I now know how bad office politics are and how demented all this people could be. All the back stabbing and scheming against everyone that they use to call friend...Its unbelievable and scary at the same time as I could not imagine how evil a person could be..when I say evil I really mean it.....like devil reincarnate..

I am lost for words with whats happening that I m more inclined to just keep quiet and talked to only those closest to me in the office and just work...work n work...At times I just can't do it...no mood to work and all I can do is stare at a blank computer or surf the net....when that happens I will most of the time call Abossa and whine....as usual....he alwiz know what to say to make me move my butt and bz my draggy day with work...there are actually tonnes to do......if that does not work he would allow me time off to just have my little walk to clear my mind......

My little walk would usually be to the building accross to see magazines or to my car to hear the loudest music ever or to the 8th floor to see Tina.....talking to Tina alwiz make me happi...we laugh a lot......loads and loads....we gossip about the "not so bright fellow"....it is in in red because this dispecable person is driving everyone off the cliff poor old me especially.....he is a wolf in a sheep's skin......i know that it is sinfull to talk bad about anyone but.........i can't help it...if i keep this inside I'd probably die......everythime he passes by...[thats like selalu because he has to pass my table if he wants to go out] I feel the urge to throw up ....[its better than what i felt about him weeks ago-canibal like feeling of throwing anything i have in front of me at him.....Tina has advised me to keep all sharp objects in a safe place...]..

This creature has caused a lot of people unhapiness and distress with his conduct...very vindictive person....he is unleashing his frustration on the "so called imaginary injustice" that he felt was done to him and going after those he thinks are the cause of it or related to the cause......he has forgotten that in his quest for revenge a lot of people are also effected....innocent people......I know that this is a bitter entry but to keep it inside me is causing me ulcer....I just hope n pray that the long awaited new person would come as soon as possible before what was achieved in 5 years would just be gone in a matter of days.......

But despite the gloomy office situation...somethings are changing for the better....alhamdulillah....

Do my socks comes in pair?

I am currently reading this book by Cecelia Ahern entitled A Place called Here...its a sweet book....about a women's search for that missing piece in her life........

Quotes from the book that is really meaningfull to me....i read them n it made me feel that someone out there understands and that made me feel contented and not alone....

"How do u feel when u r searching n searching but u still can't find whatever u r looking for?"

"The feeling of searching is like a feeling of knowing something is missing in your life but not being able to find it no matter how hard u look"

"Perhaps it would be easier if i said that not being able to find something is like suddenly not remembering the words to ur favourite song that u knew by heart. Its like suddenly forgetting the name of someone u know really well and see everyday, or the name of a group who sang a famous song. Its frustrating that it plays on ur mind over and over agin because u know theres an answer but no one can tell u it. It niggles n niggles at me n i can't rest until i know the answers"

"sometimes people can go missing right before our very eyes, sometimes people discover u. eventhough they've been looking at u the entire time. Sometimes we lose sight of ourselves when we're not paying attention. We all get lost once in a while, sometimes by choice, sometimes due to forces beyond our control. When we learn what it is our soul needs to learn, the path presents itself. Sometimes we see the way but wander further and deeper despite ourselves; the fear, the anger or the sadness preventing us from returning. Sometimes we prefer to be lost and wandering, sometimes its easier. Sometimes we find our way out. But regardless, alwiz we r found"

Bye